I thought I had it all at one stage. Fun, partying, money, girls and popularity. I always seemed to have the best of every situation. You couldn’t find a bigger smooth talker and bullshitter. I used to pride myself on the fact that I could talk my way out of any given situation that I found myself in. For every obvious sign of addiction, I had an excuse. Hell, it got to the point that I didn’t really give a crap that people or colleagues knew. I was out of control.
I was born in Uitenhage, a small town just outside of Port Elizabeth in the eastern cape, South Africa. Being a product of a broken marriage, I showed a rebellious streak from a young age. That being said I never lacked anything growing up. My upper middle class upbringing only fueled my delusion. There were so many things I should have been grateful for like a good education and cozy and plush home life. Yet I always thought I was hard done by.
High school was where drugging started for me. Nothing more intense than weed and alcohol at the time, but there was a lot of it! Being sporty I was always in the limelight. With adding substance to the situation gives you a greater indication why.
It wasn’t until varsity that I started doing heavier drugs. I met this smoking hot Greek model and went back to her place. The rest is history as they say. She gave me my first line. Being bit of a sex addict the combination of coke, a Greek goddess and my addictive nature, I never stood a chance.
Skipping a couple of years of progressive use, I’ll take you to 2012. The year my life crumbled for the first time. I was working a 9 to 5 as an IT sales consultant; the money was good but I absolutely hated my job. This and the fact that I had just come out of fairly disappointing long distance relationship with a German exchange student pushed me over the edge. I became Mr. party boy. My nighttime job at the time was doing marketing and guest list for a couple of popular clubs in Cape Town. As you could imagine I had free reign to a plethora of substances.
During the week it was coke and MDMA (Ecstasy) every night. Over the weekend at outdoors, or trance parties, it was a mixture of Coke, MDMA, Acid, Khat and whatever else was available. For me the party just never stopped. I was the go to guy if you wanted to get into a club for free, I had all the right connections and knew all of the right people. To me this was awesome at the time. The attention I was getting just fueled my addiction. The list of women was endless.
Nights became mornings, mornings became nights. In the interim I lost my IT job, my main source of income, and I was flat, broke. This didn’t matter to me. I was a hustler. Anything was workable. So even after months of not earning a cent I still managed to get my hands on whatever I wanted. Girls, drugs whatever.
This stage of my life came to an end when I finally overstepped the line. I ripped of some gangsters at a trance party. I had then heard I had a hit out on my name so I thought rehab might be a good idea. You know just to hide away for awhile?
This was the start of a quieter portion of my life… well at least for about 6 months. I had to stop using while I moved back home with my parents. I had no money and no job.
Just as things started looking extremely dire I met a crazy little nymph and secured a job at an advertising brokerage. The reason I call it that is because it looked and felt like I was living in the Boiler Room or The Wolf of Wall Street. I was making a ton of money, and so were my colleagues. We were wild and without a care in the world. Oh there is a problem? Just throw some money at it. Solved!
This leads me to my second life halting drug induced meltdown. While I was making a small fortune I was also consuming enough drugs daily to incapacitate a small elephant. I was partying with club owners in their penthouses and was using just about every model in Cape Town. I owned the nightlife scene in Cape Town. I owned the outdoor scene as well. I suppose this was where a majority of the drugs got consumed anyway. There was LSD and MDMA on tap and half naked girls all over the place bumping and grinding to trance. They were sweating and heaving. It was intoxicating. But I was in control of my addiction so it didn’t matter… right?
Early May 2015 things started to fall apart. I remember it clearly. We had booked all the rooms of the 17th floor of a popular hotel in Cape Town. There were girls, strippers, and piles of crack/coke. I emptied my bank account that weekend. Of no concern I thought, I’m in sales I’ll just make the money back next week. The only thing I didn’t consider was that my mind was becoming so screwed up that I was screwing up at work. From being one of the top salesman up until May all of a sudden I couldn’t sell a thing.
Next, I started to hustle all my friends again. It was 2012 all over again. I had sponsored so many parties in the past so it worked for a while. My mates were all making a packet as well. So on the party went. Bottles and bottles of Belvedere Vodka and piles, and piles of cocaine. It was an absolute mess.
My last weekend of partying went like this:
I had just been fired again, believe it or not . However, they didn’t follow proper procedure. So, I got paid out on the Thursday morning the week after being fired. Thursday night I emptied my pockets all over again on Peruvian. This was clearly a habit of mine. I paid for my then girlfriend and her best friend to join us. The night is a blur, but I remember us being thrown out of a club for doing “it” in the bathrooms, only for us to breakup at the next club after she started hitting on every other guy.
I was partying like a rock star with some heavy white collar gangsters from there on. I woke up in some hotel surrounded by a ton of some of the most beautiful women I had ever seen, but broke. On Friday I went out with a mate that wanted to have his last major blowout on that weekend, for awhile.
We bumped into an old girlfriend of mine, she was a mess. She’d lost her keys, her wallet, everything. She had just gone through a breakup so we all knew this was going to be a big night. Skipping the details. The night ended with her falling out of her 3 story apartment window. She survived. At the time I remember feeling guilty as all I was worried about was hiding the bag of cocaine before the ambulance arrived.
As I started sobering up two days later I decided to stop drugs for good. I was becoming a heartless monster. My addiction died right there and then. I just couldn’t do this anymore. Sooner or later my chances would run out. I had been stabbed, knocked over by a car, chased by gangsters and now this. It was tickets for me.
The day I quit drugs I happened to meet the love of my life as well. It seemed like everything was part of a divine plan. It just fell into place and just felt right. I found spirituality, my path to enlightenment had begun. It had its ups and downs, but it was unlike anything I had experienced up and till then. It was real.
Fast forward a couple of months and we came up with a plan, Addicts2Life. It’s still in its infancy but it is a start. Basically it is an NPO, a charity, fundraising, an opportunity to give back to the community. It hasn’t quite been launched yet, but I’m in the process of doing just that. I want to use my misguided life to show others that drugs lead nowhere, only to chaos and destruction. To put it mildly I basically have a PHD in how not to live your life. So now I want to devote my life to advocating against drugs. My aim is to raise funds for the less than fortunate, the impoverished, families who have been hit by addiction, women and children that suffer from abuse. These are the people I want to help. This is how I want to spend my life. On the pursuit of something real, unlike the life I once lead.
At the end of January, I am giving my first talk at my old high school. Another part of my new direction is motivational speaking. My story is only unfolding; I want to make a positive difference.
-Justin of Addicts2Life
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