A Place For Betterment - SubstanceForYou.Com
Cart 0

The Substance For You Saga Pt. 20

Brian McCollom abuse addiction beautiful boy blood clots classes Confessions david sheff nic sheff portal saga substance superior thrombosis tweak university vein

The Substance For You Saga Pt. 20

For part 19 go here- http://substanceforyou.com/the-substance-for-you-saga-pt-19/

A Powerful Influence with one last Lesson

Studies / Reading + Writing


Although I still felt like I was lacking something, I began to read more and more once my classes at the University picked back up. I wasn’t just reading textbooks, though. I was reading many other things, too. I started reading many self-help novels and many novels on people who have journeyed the same route I had with my addiction.

saga The Substance For You Saga Pt. 20 Z

The first book I picked up for fun/help/inspiration was Tweak by Nic Sheff. This was where I had a turning point in my recovery. I was reading and writing at the same time. I was a big fan of the books on tape and Nic happened to have Tweak on Audible! I was jotting down my story as parts of his would coincide with mine; it was truly a healing process. It hurt a lot, many of the stories were triggering and right down to the bone, but I pushed on jotting every little thing I could remember from my journey to his. I could say that his book was one of the most influential books in my addiction recovery to date. Even though I had a turning point there was still one more life lesson to be learned.

In mid-2013, I began to write my first book after reading Nic Sheff’s “Tweak” and David Sheff’s Beautiful Boy. Both of these books were recommended by my father who was also going through his recovery from my addiction at that time. Some would say we shared similar paths (Nic, Mr. Sheff, my father and I). How did it all happen, though? Did I just up and write a book about my journey overnight? No. I had all these scribbling’s and scrambled paragraphs written in my word document on my computer. I probably had fifty different rough drafts of an odd assortment of different titled books during this process. It wasn’t easy. So, the process began.

I started asking professors at the University and I had came across one who seemed to have “been there, done that.” I asked the one guy who was just off the walls rampant with his engagement to the students and putting his own story out there to help us learn. I asked my communications teacher who was published how he wrote his book. He gave me the best piece of advice I could ask for. And keep in mind communications was the one class everyone in college dreads… public speaking! But the best experience came from getting out of myself; it was awkward yet it seemed to be helping more than it was hurting. As we talked often after class and I started discussing wanting to write a book he goes: “Are you ready for it?” I said, “Yes, please tell me!” as I really didn’t know any other way to put it! He then proceeded to

Courtesy of blogs.montclair.edu

look at me funny and then says it…. “Just write. Write until you can’t anymore, about anything you can!” I said to him, “That’s it? That’s all the advice you have for me after telling me about an 800-page book you wrote?” He replied simply, “Yes, you’ll see. Just sit down and write it out.”

So after reading Tweak by Nic Sheff and finished the book of my so-called turning point, all I did was sit at my computer with a blank slate for days. Once I couldn’t sit anymore I read the book again and then sat once more. I screamed at myself, “You did all that and have nothing to say for yourself?” as I closed my eyes and pictured the most triggering image I’d been through. No matter how painful that moment was, I felt like I either snapped or I got it… it was one of the two. But then I wrote the first paragraph and from that point on I didn’t stop writing for near eight hours a day for nearly six weeks, until finally one day I had three hundred pages single spaced word document filled out for a manifesto of my life chronicling my Illicit drug abuse. It was finished.

I started to get obsessed with my story and spent nearly all of my six weeks sitting, as another addiction had arisen, whether it was healthy or unhealthy it had to be told. In the immediate future, it became unhealthy, as I needed to learn how to moderate my writing. But for the long run it was the best thing that ever happened to me once I learned the key, “moderation.”

Although there were barriers to cross first as the six weeks of sitting did my body no good. Before I could learn this moderation, life gave me a lesson in why you need to have it first and foremost or you’ll end up killing yourself from the insanity of it.

Courtesy of dreamstime.com

I ended up in the hospital over my Christmas break and my third anniversary sober. I spent so much time lying down in my bed writing or in my chair slouched over a desk that I developed blood clots in my superior and portal vein. They called it a superior and portal vein thrombosis from a lack of movement and a genetic Factor 8 disorder. Who would have thought that the one thing I tried to do to better myself I still overdid? “This was the last mistake I’ll ever make,” I told myself as I sent my book off to the editor from the hospital bed on my fourth year clean.

The superior and portal vein thrombosis meant that I have two blood clots in my liver. This gave me some down time to reflect; after I thought I’d come so far I needed to do some more work, as the book was already sent off becoming what it had to be for not only me to heal but get out there for others to read and heal, too. So, while in the hospital I contacted the necessary people from my little

Courtesy of Pinterest.comblack book and got a friend to do illustrations for it. He was a friend from high school but now works somewhere in New York… he claims the Times, but we have since fallen out after the book. I truly got my life together after a billionth wake up call and third near death experience since getting sober. This didn’t’ stop me, though. I immediately went back to school after being in the hospital over my entire winter break and did even more with my writing, ideas, and grades I’d ever thought I could…

For the SFY Saga Conclusion and Pt. 21 on my personal recovery journey, who I am, and where I am today go here- http://substanceforyou.com/the-substance-for-you-saga-pt-21-the-end/

Saga saga The Substance For You Saga Pt. 20 LogoSaga Saga about drug addiction about drugs addiction about heroin addiction abuse drug rehab addicted addicted addicted drug addicted to drug addiction addiction addiction and saga addiction book addiction drug addiction drug treatment addiction free addiction help addiction heroin Saga Saga Saga Saga addiction in addiction of drug addiction saga addiction saga blog addiction saga center addiction saga help addiction support groups addiction to addiction addiction to drug addiction to drugs addiction to heroin addiction to saga addiction treatment addiction treatment center addiction treatment centers addiction treatment program addiction treatment programs addiction treatments addictions and saga addictions book addictions help addictions saga saga abuse treatment saga addiction help saga addiction treatment saga treatment center an addiction is an addiction co addiction saga cocaine addiction help cocaine addiction treatment cost of heroin detox from herion detox heroin detoxing from heroin drug abuse drug abuse help drug abuse treatment drug addicted son drug addiction drug addiction and saga drug addiction blog drug addiction book drug addiction help drug addiction help free drug addiction is drug addiction reasons drug addiction saga drug addiction rehab drug addiction treatment drug addictions drug and addiction drug and treatment drug and drug addiction drug detox drug of addiction drug saga drug rehab drug rehab centers drug treatment centers free addiction free addiction saga free drug addiction help help addiction help drug addiction help for addiction help for addictions help for addicts help for cocaine addiction help for drug addiction help for drug addicts help with addiction help with drug addiction herion addiction herion addiction treatment herion detox herion rehab herion treatment heroin abuse heroin abuse treatment heroin addict heroin addiction heroin addiction and saga heroin addiction blog heroin addiction cure heroin addiction drug heroin addiction facts heroin addiction saga heroin addiction signs heroin addiction stories heroin addiction symptoms heroin addiction treatment heroin addiction treatment centers heroin addiction treatments heroin addiction true stories heroin addictions heroin addicts heroin clinic heroin clinics heroin detox heroin detox at home heroin detoxification heroin drug abuse heroin drugs heroin facts heroin history heroin overdose treatment heroin rehabilitation heroin rehabilitation centers heroin support groups heroin treatment heroin treatment center heroin treatment centers heroin treatment options heroin treatment programs heroin treatments heroin withdrawal heroin withdrawal symptoms heroin withdrawal treatment heroine addiction heroine detox heroine treatment heroine withdrawal treatment how to help addiction how to help drug addiction how to help with drug addiction how to treat heroin addiction just tee lsd treatment marijuana addiction help marijuana addiction treatment opiate addiction opiate addiction treatment opioid addiction treatment overcoming heroin addiction reasons for addiction
saga addiction saga and addiction saga drug addiction saga for drug addiction saga from addiction saga from addictions saga from drug addiction saga from heroin addiction in addiction signs of heroin addiction sober january 2015 substance abuse substance abuse help substance abuse treatment the drug addiction treating heroin addiction treatment for addiction treatment for drug abuse treatment for drug addiction treatment for herion treatment for heroin treatment for heroin addiction treatment for heroin addicts treatment for substance abuse treatment heroin treatment heroin addiction treatment of heroin treatment of heroin addiction treatment options for heroin treatments for heroin treatments for heroin addiction ways to combat drug abuse what drug addiction what is a drug addiction what is addiction saga what is drug addiction what is heroin addiction what is saga from addiction what is the drug addiction what to do with a drug addicted son why drug addiction

Older Post Newer Post

Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published