Official Web Site of Substance For You
Cart 0

Dear Serenity: Mas magaan ang pakiramdam ko kapag kasama kita

culture filipino just for today love Philippines recover recovery romance serene serenity serenity prayer tagalog

Goddammit why do I feel this way? I’ve screwed up so much in my life that I’m not sure how many more promises I can break! You were always there for me from the beginning, even though we only met a couple of years ago. It’s easy for me to say that I’ve been connected to you since I started my life, and the moment you started yours I knew what I was living for, it just never showed up until the day we met. And when I screw up it’s just a reminder, that you’re what makes me whole.

courtesy of

I hope you never leave, because we both know that you’re the fire within my soul. You are what makes me burn and infect this world with greatness. With you, I know that I’m a great man, but before it was just so hard to see! You pulled it out of me with the ease of greasing up car parts that have been rusting for a while, but not too damaged. You resurrected my soul, and if I ever lost that fire, I’m not sure I’d ever be able to be whole.

Your love is infectious, but I know when I act like I used to, those times before you helped me realize my true potential, that it has the potential to ruin all that we’ve worked for in OUR lives. It’s hard when I get wrapped up in those moments too because I feel like I have a loss of control. But, all it takes to bring me back is a simple soft, tender touch, and whisper of an “I love you” from you my one true love, the one I won’t give up on, ever, and forever my sweet serenity. Because without you at my side, I’m not serene. I’m not just. I’m anger in lust with itself, taking with no return, speaking with no remorse, and hurting with no end in sight. And I’m not sure if it’s my turn to save you my sweet serenity…

The moment your eyes turn from dry to wet there’s that feeling of regret. That feeling that I said I never had? You give me more than I ever thought I was capable of before. I’ve used drugs, people, and other things like food to mask my emotions. But, this time I want to feel! I want to feel you when you’re good, bad, sad, mad; all of it! I want to feel you because when I know you’re sincere—which is all the time—that I can finally feel without hurting anymore! I used to hurt so much, and I’d mask it, but this time the feeling I have with you is a feeling of “being enough.” The feeling I have with you is better than feeling nothing at all, and it’s true, I love you! My sweet serenity, I’d rather feel pain with you, than cover up anything and everything with some stupid one-night fix. My world is turned upside down with all of these sounds roaring when we get into something—a fight—but you know that is what I crave for today because it makes me feel alive! You give me the motivation in my life to push for one more cent in our bank, one more minute of air, one more glass of water, and one more moment to prove that with your love I am finally trustworthy!

As I work my way through this little eulogy of me to you, of me and you, I started with a “Why?” and a “Goddammit.” But, now knowing what I’ve learned from you, although I may have screwed up, I know now that your love is always enough to turn things around. Just for today, I am able to shed myself of this dead weight I feel that holds me back and strive for greatness because I know that I can let go of my resentments; because of your love, our love. Again, I am now feeling hopeful again, in my own little space to work things out. I am whole again. You are always enough, you do the greatest things any man could ask for in his loving, compassionate woman. You are my sweet serenity, but if you don’t know, you’re so much more. You’re an amazing, hard working wife, compassionate and loving daughter, the other half to our creation Substance For You, and my realness to reality. You wake me up when I feel like sleeping the pain away. You are my wholeness no matter what, and with that I—I mean we—can conquer the world. You are enough!

And what is this that I’m writing? I know it’s a part of my “Dear Serenity” series, and it’s a terrific blog post meant to inspire the world with my recovery journey, but I also know that it’s my way of working out the good and the bad. It’s a way to help me start to heal when I need just a few moments away. And then it’s a way to send you my thoughts in full, share it with the world hoping to help someone else. This is recovery in its fullest because this is real life, this is more than us, this is the epitome of what everyone in any recovery is and can go through. So I hold my head up high, proving our life as an example to be proud of each other, opening a new chapter in our lives to heal each other and the lives of our world. I then bow my head in a prayer for you, our families, and a chance to lift your spirit hoping you know that you’re beautiful and then I rush into the room with a kiss on your lips, holding you tight, knowing we are meant for so much more, while being blissfully forgiven in, 3… 2… 1! I love you! My sweet serenity…


-You make me a better man! Ikaw Ang Lahat Sa Akin!
-I wrote this just for you <3 Sinulat ko ito para sa iyo!
-No I don't care who sees! Wala akong pakielam kung sino ang makakita!
-Why? Cuz I wanna grow old with you… Dahil gusto kong tumanda kasama ka!

-Us in 80 years —>
-Mahal kita mahal ko
courtesy of

serenity serenity   Dear Serenity: Mas magaan ang pakiramdam ko kapag kasama kita  Logoserenity serenity serenity serenity > about drug addiction bipolar serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity serenity sleep sleep about drugs addiction about heroin addiction abuse drug rehab addicted addicted addicted drug addicted to drug addiction addiction addiction and drug dealer addiction book addiction drug addiction drug treatment addiction free addiction help addiction heroin Drug dealer Drug dealer Drug dealer Drug dealer addiction in addiction of drug addiction drug dealer addiction drug dealer blog addiction drug dealer center addiction drug dealer help addiction support groups addiction to addiction addiction to drug addiction to drugs addiction to heroin addiction to drug dealer addiction treatment addiction treatment center addiction treatment centers addiction treatment program addiction treatment programs addiction treatments addictions and drug dealer addictions book addictions help addictions drug dealer drug dealer abuse treatment drug dealer addiction help drug dealer addiction treatment drug dealer treatment center an addiction is an addiction co addiction drug dealer cocaine addiction help cocaine addiction treatment cost of heroin detox from herion detox heroin detoxing from heroin drug abuse drug abuse help drug abuse treatment drug addicted son drug addiction drug addiction and drug dealer drug addiction blog drug addiction book drug addiction help drug addiction help free drug addiction is drug addiction reasons drug addiction drug dealer drug addiction rehab drug addiction treatment drug addictions drug and addiction drug and drug dealer treatment drug and drug addiction drug detox drug of addiction drug drug dealer drug rehab drug rehab centers drug treatment centers free addiction free addiction drug dealer free drug addiction help help addiction help drug addiction help for addiction help for addictions help for addicts help for cocaine addiction Drug dealer Drug dealer Drug dealer Drug dealer help for drug addiction help for drug addicts help with addiction help with drug addiction herion addiction herion addiction treatment herion detox herion rehab herion treatment heroin abuse heroin abuse treatment heroin addict heroin addiction heroin addiction and drug dealer heroin addiction blog heroin addiction cure heroin addiction drug heroin addiction facts heroin addiction drug dealer heroin addiction signs heroin addiction stories heroin addiction symptoms heroin addiction treatment heroin addiction treatment centers heroin addiction treatments heroin addiction true stories heroin addictions heroin addicts heroin clinic heroin clinics heroin detox heroin detox at home heroin detoxification heroin drug abuse heroin drugs heroin facts heroin history heroin overdose treatment heroin rehabilitation heroin rehabilitation centers heroin support groups heroin treatment heroin treatment center heroin treatment centers heroin treatment options heroin treatment programs heroin treatments heroin withdrawal heroin withdrawal symptoms heroin withdrawal treatment heroine addiction heroine detox Drug dealer Drug dealer Drug dealer Drug dealer heroine treatment heroine withdrawal treatment how to help addiction how to help drug addiction how to help with drug addiction how to treat heroin addiction just tee lsd treatment marijuana addiction help marijuana addiction treatment opiate addiction opiate addiction treatment opioid addiction treatment overcoming heroin addiction reasons for addiction
drug dealer addiction drug dealer and addiction drug dealer drug addiction drug dealer for drug addiction drug dealer from addiction drug dealer from addictions drug dealer from drug addiction drug dealer from heroin addiction drug dealer in addiction signs of heroin addiction sober january 2015 substance abuse substance abuse help substance abuse treatment the drug addiction treating heroin addiction treatment for addiction treatment for drug abuse treatment for drug addiction treatment for herion treatment for heroin treatment for heroin addiction treatment for heroin addicts treatment for substance abuse treatment heroin treatment heroin addiction treatment of heroin Drug dealer Drug dealer Drug dealer Drug dealer treatment of heroin addiction treatment options for heroin treatments for heroin treatments for heroin addiction ways to combat drug abuse what drug addiction what is a drug addiction Drug dealer what is addiction drug dealer what is drug addiction what is heroin addiction what is drug dealer from addiction what is the drug addiction what to do with a drug addicted son why drug addiction

Older Post Newer Post

Leave a comment

Please note, comments must be approved before they are published