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Confessions — mental illness

My Worst Sin

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My Worst Sin

Denial is the evilest--and my worst--sin of all.  I would rather regret something I did than never have an opportunity to make a change at all.  There are so many things that I regret; I’m so freaking sorry for that.  I know that I may never see some of my friends again.  I know that a lot of my family may hate me forever.  There are people who will walk and turn the other way if seeing me in public.  But there is so much danger behind looking at someone or something and forcibly denying anything wrong had ever happened....

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Death of a People Pleaser...

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Death of a People Pleaser...

I miss a lot of things every day of my life. It's so very exhausting! Like missing socializing. But the ways that I socialized were killing me in the process. I thought that if I accommodated what others felt was "cool" to fit in, I was cool too. But boy was I was wrong. If I didn't get high, if I didn't bring drugs or do them, then I was the biggest outcast in what was supposed to be "my realm." And that isn't reality. Those situations were just defeating any part of myself that allowed people who truly cared about...

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Mental Illness is So Relatable

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Mental Illness is So Relatable

Something I never thought I'd need to deem "Quote-worthy..." but it’s helping me cope. -When people #hurt they need you for EVERYTHING. When I hurt people see me as nothing. I am subjectively invisible... #mentalillness 😔 -Even if you’re by yourself, you’re never truly alone.  🙏 -I may not know exactly what you’re going through but I do know what it feels like to struggle. #pain -Pain is universal. But I’m so glad we are so alike! #unity -Don’t live #life by a setting of defaults. #Flaws are so freaking #beautiful 🙏 -Pain is certain. Suffering is option #PMA #NotAlone  ...

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Free Will Vs. Suicide: A Philosophical Debate

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Free Will Vs. Suicide: A Philosophical Debate

How do you conquer one of Earth's greatest mystery('s)?  "FREE WILL" When opening the conversation towards the existence of free will, I will so kindly ask you to choose if free will exists, or is an illusion that lies between pleasures, pains, and selfish ideologies. Without any outside influence, you will make a choice. The choice is yours and only yours. Above all else you can choose not to choose. Go forth with no thought on output of this decision. Remember that there is infinite number of choices; including null, nothing, or no answer. You have no reason to choose....

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No One Brings Casseroles When Your Loved One is Mentally Ill!

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No One Brings Casseroles When Your Loved One is Mentally Ill!

Back when my 14-year- old son called me from school and said he knows he should be happy and he is a lucky boy, but he feels like he wants to die, I truly panicked. It was as if I wasn’t hearing the right words coming out of his mouth. I knew I wasn’t equipped for this situation!!!! I asked him if I could take him to his doctor and when he replied yes, at that point I knew my son was clearly showing signs of mental illness. I sat stunned in utter silence, panicking and paralyzed, not able to...

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