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Confessions — pain

Mental Illness is So Relatable

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Mental Illness is So Relatable

Something I never thought I'd need to deem "Quote-worthy..." but it’s helping me cope. -When people #hurt they need you for EVERYTHING. When I hurt people see me as nothing. I am subjectively invisible... #mentalillness 😔 -Even if you’re by yourself, you’re never truly alone.  🙏 -I may not know exactly what you’re going through but I do know what it feels like to struggle. #pain -Pain is universal. But I’m so glad we are so alike! #unity -Don’t live #life by a setting of defaults. #Flaws are so freaking #beautiful 🙏 -Pain is certain. Suffering is option #PMA #NotAlone  ...

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What my Sister has Missed Since her Addiction

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What my Sister has Missed Since her Addiction

An addiction is more like an affliction. It's a realization that the life you once had with the sister I once knew is gone gone forever until one day she may wakes up and makes the choice. The choice to be a sister, to be a mother, to be a daughter, to be an Aunt, to be a niece, to be a cousin to be there for the ones who love her and stop being there for one thing a drug. A drug named Roxy. Roxy stole my sister. The drug stole the only sibling I had left. To say...

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The Worst Thing Mental Illness Did to Me!

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The Worst Thing Mental Illness Did to Me!

Depression, chronic pain, panic disorders, and eating disorders are all like a double edged sword with no winning; especially coupling them all together into one horrible, wretched scenario. That is, at least until you get your twenty minutes of solace each day. We all know there are those twenty good minutes to remind us that there must be some sense of hope, until, we are torn to absolute shreds again. Dealing with depression or anxiety with chronic pain is worse than anything I’ve ever had to just “wait out.” And that’s exactly what it is… a waiting game! Who wins?...

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I'm So Selfish!

hurt hurt myself i'm sorry inflicting pain mental health mental illness pain self-harm selfish serenity so sorry

I'm So Selfish!

Hell… I’m so sorry! I’ve been so selfish lately and I feel that I’ve done a bad job of controlling it. Or is that my problem too? Controlling too much of the situation! If I knew, we wouldn’t be here. With you mad at me. This just wouldn’t or shouldn’t be happening… right? But I don’t know who I am sometimes when the worst in me comes out! I just lose it!  There’s something to your silence that tells a man, “I screwed up.” But whether or not you’re silent, I know that I shouldn’t be facing the world the...

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Why is Change so damn Painful?

Addict addiction change Confessions Drugs eating disorders fake mental health pain pain of change phony recovered recovery sober

Why is Change so damn Painful?

So, it turns out recovery is hard work sometimes.  It seems like I must have already known this.  Maybe that is what kept me in addiction for so long.  In the beginning of my journey, I felt like I was on the treadmill of life running on a 12% incline.  Change is hard and growth ...

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