Last night I was in terror of myself! I was having a bad day, well week, and everything that I did was wrong… just wrong! I was battling a respiratory infection and it wasn’t going well, damn near turning into the flu! Luckily I’d caught the doctor before it got too bad and he gave me some non-narcotic antibiotics and steroid dose pack for it. And if you know anything about me, my mental health goes crazy when I’m sick, as most addicts does! But to mention health, I had recovered from an auto-immune disorder that will forever give me reoccurring nerve damage when I do get things like the flu! So, it was urgent that I nipped this in the butt…
Today? Today, I’m feeling like a better man…
When your doctor says something you should probably listen right? Well, you guessed it. Although I thought that I was taking care of myself by seeing him, I didn’t quite listen to him 100%. It says on the labels to drink plenty of water. But hey! I’m more like a tea guy! I usually do the lowest caffeine possible, because if you’ve read my “Caffeine makes me crazy” article you’ll only see instances of madness, insanity, and mania. Although, I was belligerent these past week because evidently prednisone has an effect of amping you up, BIG TIME! I guess that’s why he said to drink extra water, right?
So, with the littlest bit of tea I had felt like I’d drunk a monster, red bull, and Starbucks coffee. And me, knowing me best, I was on the edge of my seat with my mental health, literally repeating insanity, over and over again! Isn’t that sort of the definition of it?
I consulted friends and was constantly asking how to fix myself if I didn’t know what was broken. I would be screaming via text message, and luckily I have great friends to put up with me who’ve been there, too. But, again, I wasn’t listening to their words, which was: 1) go to meetings 2) sending well wishes. I was soothed more by their conversation but I haven’t been to a meeting in well over six years, they just haven’t worked for me in the past. So I reconsidered my options… “If I am sick and not feeling well, I need to take care of myself ASAP!”
Now, after a long conversation with my wife and a day full of chugging water and eating fruit, we sat down to a good dinner and she looked at me and said, “We have food on our table, we have a new house in a beautiful neighborhood, and most of all we love each other! What else do we need?” And I learned right there that she was my meeting, and my water therapy had worked when it clicked, “I’ll stop worrying right now!” I said with a smile!
So from then on out I’ve had a stress free day, my respiratory infection has gotten remarkably better, and I’m living a happy and serene life in the house that my recovery built, bought and moved in three weeks ago!
Life is great, so I’m telling you now…
Things may get rough, but don’t take any bit of it for granted! Why? Because it’s the bad times that make the good ones into great ones! I love my wife, I love my friends, and I love my sober support system I’ve built through you and Substance For You.
Just for today, I am clean and doing the right thing… A’freaking-men! #GodBless