On our 4th of July--Independence Day in America--I found my peace with independence by accepting that I was deserving enough to have togetherness as a part of my happiness! And that involved loving and being loved! 🎉
While I always felt undeserving to let others love me, that was my selfish attitude talking, when many people already loved me! And to withhold my heart from the World I was isolating my those who loved me from the beauty that was only reciprocated through togetherness!
While it is okay to be alone, it's more of being okay with being you without restrictions of judgement in order for you to be to your own fullest potential so that when others are in your life, you are your own person; not an alone person. Which is why it is so important to know what you find valuable in yourself, and why it is important to never stray from what makes you feel that worth.
Never change you for any exterior motive. Which is why when I learnt to be okay being alone, it was more of learning to love the truest parts of myself for when my heart was ready to let those in to share the beauty I know the World deserves to see from me too! Bringing together the point of being an independent soul in a World where togetherness is so very important!
The best part of this realization is that, recovery or not, my purpose in life is to KEEP LIVING towards whatever "betterment" means to me so I give all of the real me to growing a beautiful family and legacy that I never thought that I was worthy of! But, everyone deserves happiness; it just took a lot of resentment, shame, and stigma to get past in order to find it!
My beautiful wife helped me come to a realization on where beauty lies in life, more than anyone, besides God, would ever know! 💫 You may think that sounds cheesy. And the Lord knows that I never thought someone could love me THIS MUCH!
And what we do as individuals who combine our love is such an important role to keeping the World growing right alongside us!
While the only thing that was holding me back was letting myself genuinely smile and let love in, and let love out, like you see in this photo!
I'm so happy to be where I am and it was an incredibly hard road! A road that I am always figuring out...
But, I wouldn't change a single thing in my, or our, journey! Especially with any minuscule change there would never be this true, genuine, and loving family you see in the photo here! It was and is so damn hard, but so damn worth it! While I am wholeheartedly a fan of needing to struggle and fail first in order to grow and succeed. Because the World is set up for you to succeed if you try. But if you do try, know that you will fail, and continue to fail, because failure is 1) subjective 2) progressive 3) a necessary tool. And without failure we would be a World filled with no meaning and a society fed by an endless supply of ignorance!
So please... NEVER, EVER GIVE UP!
Something that is holding your best potential for happiness back may be just the thing that will create a fruition of endless happiness! And it never came in the way that I, or you, wanted it; and continually terrifying!
From what I have learned is that feeling "scared" is such a similar feeling and release of endorphins to the feelings of "excitement" while diving into a true positive mental attitude and embracing the laws of attraction, I am no longer scared, and live for a future I am excited to have! Because that opportunity was once, twice, and many times, almost squandered! I vow to never take life and love for granted again!
I started truly living when I opened my mind and heart to acceptance that was true to me and of where I was! It is a constant reminder to never have a lack of gratitude or being thankful for the blessings I am in deserve of!
And is when my life turned from being where I needed, and being where I wanted, into the same exact thing! [Dear Dad & Grandma Alice (RIP)... this quote is from you! xoxo]
Now I'm able to look back at life and smile. Better yet, I am able to look forward at the opportunity of an amazing life and smile too! So trust me MIRACLES DO HAPPEN! Remembering that same miracle always lies within you when you are ready for it...
Please spend time with those you love ❤️🙏 and know that people DO LOVE YOU! I do because I am you!
Brian, Patricia, Cinnamon, and Titan King (not pictured) McCollom